Leading the Team.

 

I just thought I'll take the chance to reflect on how I think my journey as a Whanau Leader is going. Leading is not a new feeling to me because when I think about leadership I think about my role as the head of my family my role in my church family and now in my working family. So far it has been good because of God's grace and direction I always acknowledge his presence in my life because without him I am nothing. When I accomplish something I will always say his name out loud and in my thoughts because its all him. This is a quality I think leaders should carry because it makes so much sense to me. We are humans and we all have a spirit and that spirits connects to the all most high. without his presents and spirit I dont know how someone can do life without acknowledging that there is a higher source that plays apart in shaping our day to day life. 

Since being team leader I have realised that there are responsibilities I carry over the responsibilities I already have. I appreciate my team so much they are very experienced teachers and they work so well together. Each team member has their strengths and their needs in our teams. I am a leader that loves to create positive relationships with my colleagues I feel like this my strength, I also love making sure the environment is a safe place to share ideas and thoughts with a little bit humour to get us through out planning. There is more too than this. Yes this is very important for any team like we always say we need establish strong relationships with our people before any effective learning can occur. 

I have been leading team meetings, Whakawhanaungatanga tasks, updating slides, making sure admin is covered in terms of trips and organisation of programmes like Samoan Language Week. I realise I have to be on top of everything for my team so everything runs smoothly and so there are no questions about clarity. Also realising that even if there are things I miss that I dont look past the person but acknowledge their ideas, their thinking process, and say thank you for this and I will look to get back to our team. Im not going to know all the answers but I can always acknowledge my teams contribution to our team. I like to think that if I haven't thought about everything one of my team members will cover this for the overall clarity of the team. Im not sure if this is the right way of thinking, sometimes I do think that I have to do everything but in fact I don't because I can use the awesome teachers in my team to lead and support. At the end of the day we are all leaders in the Va'a and we all have a part to play in order for our va'a to not capsize. 

My fa'asamoa has really developed over the years and that is dedicated to my mother for forcing me to be apart of church, performing every Sunday and hearing my Mother and Father speak it everyday. No they did not deliberately teach me every Grammer structures but definitely laid a foundation for me to build on. When I feel comfortable and when I feel everyone believes in me I soar like eagle, I can be me and as a result the environment becomes amplified. It goes to show that our students too need to feel this way in school. What is your uniqueness? what is your gift that god has given you to share to the world? I believe every child has a gift from GOD they will carry with them and put in action before that glorious day. 

I have been feeling a certain way lately in terms of my calling, not just a believer but my calling as a teacher. There was this evening driving home and I was speaking to him about the way I was feeling, and at times I just need god to confirm and give peace that what I am feeling is real or a distraction. I just have to trust and serve in the opportunities god has given me. Yes for myself but for my lil family God has blessed me with. 

When I think about my leadership our leaders asked a question what was one time you had to show leadership in your role as leader? I could just think of my role taking the meetings, and organisation coverage for my team. I know my team see me as this positive, humorous person who just sets a seki environment but at times I feel like I need to pull back on this and really hone in to my role as a leader now. I am not saying im changing my personality but really thinking about my growth as a leader and how this may come across to others in my team. Yes they see me as this guy but what about the guy who is a leader now. How am I going to support my team of teachers? how am I going to shift their thinking? their practise? because isn't this what a good leader does? I guess this is the next challenge for me as the leader but in saying this its my first year of leading so I need to soak up all the learning experience from Sima and my elders in the teaching profession. 

Realisation

 

I always new Gods Grace is for everyone and it is definitely for my students. Something happened to one of my students that really shocked me as an educator. I know at times people/kids bottle feelings, hurt and suffering inside and when triggered it can cause one to have a very explosive outburst where they become the bad guy from the people around him perspective. Doesn't mean to be so offensive with language and grouped negative words but it was festering for very long time. Its like a rat that has been restricted to a significant small area of space. Where does the rat go? the only way it knows which is down! 

My students are going through some serious emotional roller-coasters and I need to stop being that teacher that thinks everything will be fixed with a telling off or a lecturer but realise these students need an understanding heart to heart but also a good listening ear. I get so caught up in the business of the curriculum, planning, leading and forget that students need this space where we can talk about issues or emotions they are going through and finding hard to navigate for themselves. That strict mentality of a teacher yes there is a place for it but it is not going to work for all struggling students. 

This leads me to my boys in class, Aj, Luvino and Christony. I honestly do not know what to do to turn these youngs around to becoming more leadership focused where they can manage themselves and their behaviours in class and outside of class. The growling is not working for these boys. I think I know why its because thats all they get at home. They are use to it and coming to school and getting growling from is not helping them and not helping me.  At times you got to humble yourself and say these boys are not responding well to my behaviour management. My own daughters respond to it but this does not necessarily mean my students will. This is going to a challenging one for me but all I know is that I have to figure out what I am going to do to turn it around for these boys. They have already created this stigma where there a disapproval of them already. They are being talked about being the boys who cause a lot of the trouble when you continue to make the wrong choices you leave a stain that is hard to rub out unless you can prove youself and get that trust. We as teachers all love hearing teachers say "Luvino has really found his feet this year" or "Christony has really clamed down and realise he needs to grow up" but there needs to be intervention. The question is what?